Stop Shepherding by Doing—Start Being! with God!

You can’t lead your family well if you don’t know the One you claim to follow. Too many men are busy doing for God but never actually being with Him. If your leadership isn’t built on a real, intimate relationship with Christ, you’re leading on fumes.

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God’s Promise for Today

Psalm 37:4 – Delight yourself in the Lord, and he will give you the desires of your heart. (ESV)

I once thought God was calling me to missions. Not a short-term trip—no, I was ready to sell my house, pack my bags, and move overseas with my wife, leaving behind my grown kids and everything I knew. I studied, took courses, spent money, even met with a mortgage broker. I was all in. Until, suddenly, I wasn’t.

Somewhere along the way, I stopped praying. Or maybe I never really started. I was so locked in on doing for God that I forgot to be with God. I had convinced myself that serving was the goal. That movement meant progress. That if I just got busy enough, I was doing His will.

But I had it backward.

Jesus didn’t call us to be workers first. He called us to be sons, friends and brothers in Him with Jesus. Men who know Him before they go out and do for Him. Yet too many of us get this wrong. We chase the mission, the work, the responsibilities and the checklist—but we don’t sit with the Father. We don’t delight in the Lord before we ask Him for direction.

The truth hit me hard: I wasn’t focused on my relationship with God. I wasn’t even focused on my relationships with my kids or my church. I was chasing an idea—an identity I thought would make me feel useful to God. But God doesn’t need our work—He wants our hearts.

Are you making the same mistake?

Men, we love action. We love purpose. Fixing things makes us feel good. We love feeling needed. But God didn’t design us to lead on our own strength. He didn’t call us to serve so we could check a box. He called us to Himself first.

Think about Abraham. God called him out of his homeland, but He didn’t just hand him a map and send him on his way. No—God walked with him. Abraham’s relationship with God was so close that he could ask the Lord to spare an entire city. Yet even Abraham had limits. He stopped pleading for Sodom when maybe, just maybe, God would have gone even further (Genesis 18:25-33). Abraham didn’t lack courage—he lacked the deep intimacy with God that Jesus came to restore.

And that’s what we’re missing too.

Men, you don’t need a bigger mission. You don’t need another thing to do. As a matter of fact, I would suggest you chop down your todo list.

You need Him, you need Jesus. And until you grasp that, everything else—your leadership, your fatherhood, your marriage—will run on empty.

I learned this the hard way. I stopped the mission plans, not because they were bad, but because God revealed something greater—that my first call was to be with Him. To enjoy my friendship with Jesus the way I enjoy my time with my family. To seek Him before seeking a task.

And I want the same for you.

So here’s the challenge: **Stop leading on autopilot. Stop assuming that your work is the same as your walk. Walking with God, is not the same as working for Him.  **

Seek God first—not because you want answers, but because you want Him.

Because when you do? Your leadership will change. Your home will change. And you’ll finally step into the bold, unwavering servant leadership God has called you to.

Shepherding in Action Value

Intimacy with God comes before leadership. A man who leads without walking closely with God is leading on his own strength—and ultimatly, that will be leading on fumes.

Three Reflection Questions

1. Are you leading your family out of relationship with Christ or just routine responsibility?
2. What distractions keep you from simply delighting in God?
3. How can you shift your priorities to seek God first before trying to serve Him?

Bible References (ESV)

• Psalm 37:4 – Delight yourself in the Lord, and he will give you the desires of your heart.
• Genesis 18:25-33 – Abraham intercedes for Sodom but stops before seeing God’s full response.
• Matthew 6:33 – But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you.

Short Prayer

Father, remind me that before I can lead, I must follow You. Teach me to seek You—not just for answers, but for the joy of being with You. Make me the kind of man who leads his family from a place of deep relationship with You. Amen.

These weekday reflections flow from my time in God’s Word. I invite you to join me and other Men of the Shepherd in building Christ-centered homes—leading, discipling, and serving like Jesus.

If these reflections encourage you, please like, share, and pass them on so more men can grow in their calling.

To follow along with the weekday readings, check out our Weekday Reflections Playlist on YouTube or subscribe to the YouTube channel here.

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