Back to the Big Picture

Theme: Bold Risks for God

You can’t lead your family well if you’re obsessed with control and blind to God’s bigger story.

It’s easy to get caught up in being the “perfect” husband or father. We chase performance, praise, and being the hero. But in doing that, we often forget our real mission—to lead by surrender, to disciple by example, and to focus not on ourselves, but on God.

This devotional calls Christian men back to what matters: God’s Word, servant leadership, and leading our families with courage and clarity.

Luke 10:20 (NIV)

“However, do not rejoice that the spirits submit to you, but rejoice that your names are written in heaven.”

There was a season when I got so focused on being a great dad and a great husband that I completely missed the point. I thought if I could just do more, show up better, be stronger, or even be more “spiritual,” that somehow my home would fall into place. But the more I tried to fix things in my own strength, the more anxious I became. And when I got anxious, I clamped down harder.

It wasn’t long before I found myself overwhelmed, angry, and distracted. I was missing the big picture.

When we get so focused on one part of the story—especially when it’s about us—we lose sight of God’s bigger story. We start discipling our kids and loving our wives from a place of performance, not presence. That’s not discipleship. That’s insecurity disguised as effort.

If you’re stuck trying to prove yourself as a man, let me ask you something: where is God in your focus? When you look at your role as a husband or father, are you focused on outcomes, or are you focused on obedience? Are you trying to control the results, or are you walking in step with the Spirit?

We don’t need more men who chase status in their homes. We need men who walk in surrender.

Discipleship starts when we step back. When we pause. When we breathe. When we ask, “God, where are You in this? And where am I?”

Oswald Chambers nailed it. He said, “Our work begins where God’s grace has laid the foundation.” That foundation is Jesus. And our job as Christian men is not to become the savior of our homes, but to point everyone in our home to the Savior.

Men of the Shepherd aren’t dictators. We aren’t micromanagers. We aren’t CEO dads or motivational speakers to our wives. We are servants. Carriers of the sword and messengers of peace. We live with a deeper awareness that God has called us to reflect Jesus’ character, not just recite His words.

Discipleship is not a program. It’s not a podcast. It’s not a church event. It’s the life you live in your home every day. It’s your tone when you walk in the door. It’s the way you apologize when you blow it. It’s how you handle stress, how you speak truth, how you give grace, and how you get back up when you fall.

Our kids are watching. Our wives are watching. And this is not intentional, it’s part of life. And they are not watching to see if we’re perfect, but to see if we’re real, authentic and vulnerable.

If we’re going to lead our homes like Jesus, we need to stop trying to be in control of everything and start walking in step with the Spirit. This means rejecting passivity. It means taking responsibility. It means being the first to say, “I was wrong.”

It means getting into the Word not just to check a box, but because we desperately need it. Our families need men whose hearts are soft before God and strong for their homes.

There is nothing weak about being yielded to God. That’s where the power comes from.

So today, step back and look at the big picture. Is your focus on your performance? Or is your heart anchored in His presence?

Because when you love Jesus more deeply, you will love your family more deeply. And from that deep love, your desire to disciple will grow.

This is where I am now. I’m not leading my home from a platform. I’m leading from my knees. And if you feel like you’ve messed up or missed it, good news—God isn’t done. But He is calling you to step up.

Not with pride. Not with ego. But with a sword in your hand, peace in your spirit, and your eyes fixed on Jesus.

Let’s go, let’s disciple.

In this week’s theme of “Living with Intentional Focus,”
Today’s “Shepherding in Action” Value is:
“Leading from God’s presence, not personal performance.”

When we disciple from presence, not pressure, we reflect the character of Christ to our families.

Reflect / Apply / Share

1. Reflect – Am I more focused on controlling the outcome in my home, or on being obedient to God today?
2. Apply – What’s one way I can step back this week and realign my leadership with God’s presence instead of my own pressure?
3. Share – Who can I encourage this week with the reminder that we lead best when we lead surrendered?

Bible References (NIV)

Luke 10:20 — “However, do not rejoice that the spirits submit to you, but rejoice that your names are written in heaven.”

Personal Prayer

Father, help me stop focusing on my performance and return to Your presence. Keep me grounded in You so I can lead my family the way You’ve called me to.

My Personal Journey & Engagement Call

These weekday reflections flow from my time in God’s Word. I invite you to join me and other Men of the Shepherd in building Christ-centered homes—leading, discipling, and serving like Jesus.
If these reflections encourage you, please like, share, and pass them on so more men can grow in their calling.
To follow along with the weekday readings, check out our Weekday Reflections Playlist on YouTube or subscribe to the YouTube channel here.

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